Friday, 7 March 2014

Alphos and the Computer Wizard

Alphos:                        Good morning Sir.
Computer Wizard:      how are you today Alphos.
Alphos:                        Am fine Sir.
Computer Wizard:      so what brought you to my computer centre today?
Alphos:                        Sir, are you a computer wizard?
Computer Wizard:      yes that just my field. I treat computer like no man business. I am a lecturer in youmeyou Computer University, you understand?
Alphos:                        do you believe yourself Sir, as computer wizard?
Computer Wizard:      yes!
Alphos:                        can you defend this now?
Computer Wizard:      yes!
Alphos:                        hope you wouldn’t mind I’ll like to know a few things from you?
Computer Wizard:      alright go ahead.
Alphos:                        what is a computer sir?
Computer Wizard:      it is an electronic device that accepts data and manipulate on them.
Alphos:                        okay, but that answer is not satisfying, I’ll manage it though but if this computer accepts data and manipulates on them without producing information, has it fulfilled its purpose?
Computer Wizard:      No!
Alphos:                        then you missed it and I caught you on that one. Next question Sir. Someone that writes is called a writer and a person who publishes is a publisher. One who types is called what.
Computer Wizard:      (thinks for a moment) a typewriter!
Alphos:                        caught you again no. 2. You didn’t get the answer. The answer is a typist. Typewriter is a machine. Data are transferred in ……………..
Computer Wizard:      flashers, compatibility diskette aka CD, external hard CD and so on. I can list them up to hmmm, in fact they are more than numbering.
Alphos:                        firstly, you talk barbaric. And secondly you failed beyond notice. Before I explain let me make some corrections. Flash drives and not flashers. Compact disk not compatibility diskette which is CD. External hard disk and it is not hard CD. Take note. Transferring of data in your system is beyond your observance and it is done in bits or junks, the materials listed above are used to store these data. Can we move ahead?
Computer Wizard:      have a little headache, tomorrow please. Let me ask you this last question, what is HTTP.
Alphos:                        Simply hyper text transfer protocol.
Computer Wizard:      now you see how you failed it.
Alphos:                        how Sir? (Looking confused)
Computer Wizard:      you put s, that is ‘SIMPLY’, while there was no s’
Alphos:                        good day sir, I think you need HTTP.
Computer Wizard:      which is?

Alphos:                        hyper tension treatment plant.

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