As one gets out of the teenage years going into the twenties,
he/she tends to focus mainly on two things, making money and making a family.
So here we are! Today on our Checkpoint section, completing
our series I will be talking about marriage, finding your SO. You are wondering
at the post heading. Let me explain ( I think I owe that for proper
understanding). By sooner or later, I mean does it keep bubbling in your heart
each time you sleep or rise up. Do you think of getting into it Now or Later,
maybe six, eight or ten years ahead. The follow up, Till Then? am asking you,
does it not bother you at the moment, maybe because of your commitments
somewhere or because you are not up to the age. So, you will want to fix
yourself in one of the categories and let’s soar together. I think this post is
getting singlelish in nature (emphasis on the singlelish) but in any case all
the Alphasoars in the house that have married have one thing or the other to
contribute to the discussion. Your advice or suggestion using the comment box
will helps those that are still single.
Now let’s soar . . .
1. Never engage a selfie. You will permit in the use of that word. Selfie in
this sense refers to those that are selfish. You will never want to settle with
them. This group of individuals is those that don’t care about the next. They
are highly ‘me’ in nature. So when you find someone and you think you have
found the right one for you and you discover that he/she is always a selfie, I advise
you to check yourself properly before saying ‘Yes’ and lather saying ‘I do’.
Because when you go into relationship with such people, you’ll discover that
your life will be filled with miseries and woes. Have you wondered at seeing
someone that can sacrifice his/her undividable item for you just to make you
happy? This blueprint is talking about character.
2. Find him/her at the right place. It may take a year or two to find your
SO, but where do you find him/her. Picture this in your mind, you are looking
for her and knowing full well that you don’t party, drink nor smoke and you are
not looking for someone with those traits. Then you now dressed smartly as a
perfect gentleman you are on a cool Friday and you walks directly to a club
house (in search mode). Who do you want to get in there? A Reverend Sister?
There is also need for carefulness as you may not find that
person you will love in the church as you might think now. I was super thrilled
at this statement when I first heard it, ‘human beings are the best
pretenders’. So you know that someone might just be pretending and be in church
in the sole aim of getting someone that marry him/her. I do not in any case
doubt the possibility as well, but you understand that not every mild, soft
spoken and nice sister you see in church are good at home. They did not come
for fellowship, they came for shopping. Husband/wife shoppers they are called.
And it is either you get them or they add you to their cart. So, go to the
right place to get the best you desire, maybe a club, church or game center.
Know that it can happen anytime. This blueprint is talking about carefulness.
3.
Pause, Listen then Play. Sometimes it happens and wam!!! You think
you’ve got it. But before your hand and soul do the ‘wam’ and your respiratory
organs explodes in satisfaction, PAUSE. This catchy attitude is exhibited by
those on the Sooner categories, who are desperate. There is a great need for
you to pause a little and allow your inner man to talk to you. If you are
religious, you ask yourself ‘does my holy write spell anything about this
moment?’, ‘does this person ‘perfect’ a description in my holy write?’ At this
moment, there is need for prayer – whether Muslim, Hindu, Christian pray. You
must realize that there is someone that is greater and mightier in knowledge
than you and only knows the right person.
After pausing, listening then play
on. (I wouldn’t say sensual).
4.
Is there fondness, attraction? Is there that bonding
attraction between the both of you? Can you stand with him/her in public? Can
you declare with passion to your friends that ‘he/she is the man? There are
people that go into marriage and they don’t have that attraction for one
another maybe because of the individual’s money, fame or even because of PITY.
If he/she is not attracted to you, I don’t think both of you are going to make
the best of family.
5.
Do you find passion in him/her? By passion I mean, is
he/she passionate in assisting you in one way or the other. For the men, is she
willing to cook three times a day? Is she ready to do it despite the fact that
you might not be there to chop veggies for her? For the ladies, is he willing
to render help and release the resources? If there is passion in there, there
will be free flow of SERVICE for each other.
Now as I conclude this write up, remember that there is no
such thing as COMPATIBILITY in marriage. There is no way that the two of you
can be compactable; it depends on both of you to work it out. There is no smooth
sailing in marriage. The fact that you are the one marrying does not mean God
should not be involved. There is need for you to invite God in your life even
before you set out on the search for you SO. There is need to put God FIRST.
Just a word for married Alphasoars in the house, for you to
keep your husband/wife you need God. When married, it is a time for you to
develop a closer walk with God. You cannot do it on your own, looking at
families that have crumbled. Even those that have resources and you think they
won’t quarrel or fight or even divorce but you see it happening, there is need
to allow God be that Cement in your family. (S.O – Significant other).
Happy New Year in advance!!!
Happy Soaring!!!
Nice post as usual brother mi, it was an insightful read as usual. Now people say that for every 1man, there are 7 women, but i believe that for every 1 man, there is only 1 woman... I am learning thst the thing about matters of the heart is that in my confused eyes yeah, they are more of choices than emotions, so who ever we end up with will more or less be who we chose to end up with, and i believe that before saying " I do" yeah, we have to be sincere to our inner man, ask ourself can i accept this ladies flaws wholy? will i be able to stick to her regardless what may or may not come? and above all does she complement me? You said something i so do not accept brother, you said there is no Compatibility in marriage. Well I must say that there is, cause when a man meets and marries a girl who is all he is not, who dots his I's who believes and encourages him, when a man finds such a woman, that completes him, then in my eyes they are compatible. Complements of the season Alphasoar, wishing you the best of whats left of 2014, and a ghen ghen 2015 in advance. Cheers Oga Boss.
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