4 Things that Kills Relationship and the 1 Thing that Keeps it Going

All hail Alphasoars!

Today we shall do a short post on the four things we have noticed that kills relationship and the one thing that keeps it on the move. Relationships per se, may not just be that of boy and girl. Relationships are the ways people and/or things get connected to one another. It could exist between lovers, family members, parents and their children, man and pets.

The best in life is being in a relationship that you love and that has grown with time. Finding oneself in a truncated relationship(s) is not always a good feeling.

The four things we have noticed are discussed below.

A past unattended.

In this write-up, we shall concentrate on relationship that has to do with lovers - married or intending couples. When two people come together for the sole purpose of helping each other to attain their individual and collective goals, they come with their different pasts. Many people tend to kill and silence their past lives. But do we really have to? I don't think so.

Why? Oh because, the past will be forgotten but can also be remembered. We remember things in the two state of mind we could be - happy or sad. When we remember things in the former, we tend to have reasons to keep the fire burning but when it is the later, we look for fire extinguisher.

How then can the past be attended?

Settlement, Round table! Sounding not too easy to the ears but that could be the only escape route to a vomited past because by the time it comes out maybe in the sad mood of anyone, the mess would have been cleaned up.

How is it done? It is done by confiding in each other what we went through, saw and encountered before we met each other. We laugh about them, get irritated and/or feel disgust about the other. That is nice, because the door of the relationship just opened and all is free to walk out. At this juncture, let your feelings be made known to each other, those invisible are watching, lols!

What can be done at this time? It is either settled now or at a later 'fixed' time. It does not have to take ages. You can all settle it now by just crying on the shoulders of each other, walking away from each other for the meantime or 'fighting' each other about it 'in the moment'.

By the time you guys have settled whatsoever past hurts and mistakes you have encountered, you can always utilize that old saying that 'silence is the best answer to a fool'. You can be walking on the street with your SO and someone yells, 'OLOSHO', you can just simply whisper, 'oh, is that what he wanted to say after all these noise, lwkmd? Hahaha'. And you just walk away. Are you imagining that king of shame that person will walk away with?

But when you guys have not settled that past and your SO is hearing that for the very first time from a stranger, and the person is like, 'My School Bag, what's he saying? Is that true, I mean are you . . .? You can always guess what follows.

Superiority complex

I for once have not believed that gender is meant to separate people but meant to administer and address different functions and responsibilities. So, in a relationship, it should be something like, get the water while I get the fire. Everyone compliments each other.

But for some, they have to show why they are 'genderically' different from each other. They start forming boss around the whole place. It is either, 'I bring the larger money in the house' or 'do I for a second look like your mate?', 'can you talk to your father or mother like that' or 'who says you can't also do the chores or cook around here?'.

When it has gotten to this stage, exchange of blows within a short time is inevitable.

A future not reached so soon

Many people go into relationships with hiiiiiiiigggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh expectations. They lose it when the expectations seems not be attainable within a given period of time. I know a relationship that nearly crashed like the Boeing 747 crash of 1977. They met each other and saw a 'prophetic' future for each other with the type of certificates each of them possess. The man is a first class graduate from of the best institutions in the country and is currently serving in one of the country oil firms and having hope of permanent job there after service.

The lady on the other hand has a second class degree of the upper class division and currently submitting well outlined CVs to major banks that had advertised for vacancies at the time. All hopes dashed when their expectations was not in line with what they had in mind. The lady couldn't secure any banking job but settled as a reporter in a media house and the young man was not retained but was duly referred to another firm but was softly rejected and had to start a road side mechanic shop to make ends meet.

It was not up to six months until they broke the Heart and went separate ways. When people trust riches to the detriment of their personal success and happiness, it leads to frustration and depression.

Aim High and don't jump High but instead Walk High. Success should be a process.

Immaturity

My father will always say that boys and girls are never qualified for relationships. Relationships are meant for matured people or adults. It is for people who can manage their own excesses and the excesses of someone else in a matured way. When people who are immature meet each other, they start match that can't be played 90 minutes times the whole number of years they would leave on earth. Their own adventures never end. It grows to a more silly level each new morning. That is why they would always have headache about little issues that could be handled in a very simple way.

The one thing that keeps relationship going is Communication. Matured communications, not petty kind of talks. Communication is not only a talking thing but also a doing thing. It should be an act that manifests in giving and showing of affection and concern for each other.

Thanks for reading, use the comment box and tell us your views before you leave.

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Happy soaring!!!